17 weeks

Finally I've visited a clinic for my first antenatal check up. It was just a clinic nearby my apartment. I saw a bubbly lady doctor who took one glance at Emmet and asked if he is asthmatic and allergic.

And before I even realized, Emmet is already up on the exam bed beside me, carefully examining the ultrasound scan machine that was run on my tummy. So together we watched the baby on the tele above us. Emmet joined in the comments about the baby once in a while, fairly excited I supposed. The baby was squirming here and there but unfortunately the doctor couldn't make out the gender yet (maybe because it's a girl) .

I felt so relieved seeing there's an actual baby inside me. I sometimes have fears that I am imagining it or something else is growing inside me. The baby is well, two arms and two legs, a head and a body, very prominent backbone.

Pregnancy No. 2 - A blessing in disguise

My mom said bad timing. Even my husband said it’s definitely bad timing. I don’t know what my MIL said coz she said nothing to me. But I have never been so sure in my life like I felt about this pregnancy. It IS the time and I surrender to Allah about how this pregnancy is going to take its course.

Morning sickness
I remember this time is almost the same when I was pregnant with Emmet. Luckily no vomitting, just terrible nausea from 10am onwards. I feel ok when I was awaken by Emmet at around 7.30am or 8am. He would wake me up and asked me to sit at the living room with him. I would make him breakfast and drinks and switch on the tele for him. If I am so hungry, and if I have the energy, I would go down and buy nasi lemak from the shop nearby. By the time I finished my breakfast I would feel like I have taken 2 sleeping pills. The nausea is so overwhelming I can barely stand up for 2 seconds. But now that the nausea is getting less, I still feel extremely sleepy everytime after a meal, that I really need to take a nap.

The Lazy syndrome
Yup, it’s back and I really hate it. I am a Bree van de Kamp type who like her place spottless (well almost) and everything has to be at its place. But now I couldn’t be bothered. I throw everything everywhere (except Emmet’s dirty nappy, but sometimes I do forget). Now my husband is becoming like me, always membebel when I throw things here and there. I leave Emmet’s toys lying around the house. I hate doing dishes because I hate it and I don’t have the energy to stand up for 2 seconds. No sweeping, cleaning, laundry, toilet brushing etc. I can only bring myself to take care of Emmet. I do his bathing, creaming, clothing, nappy change, feeding and sleeping.

The thing is it is not that I am becoming a lazy person. I just don’t have the energy to do all those things. The body of a pregnant woman is working harder than ever especially during the first trimester. Combined with a slightly poor diet, I am really tired I feel like I am about to pengsan everytime after bathing Emmet in the morning.

Cravings
Oh gosh! I am so lucky I am in Malaysia during the dark trimester. I am craving for cheap food! If the food is more than RM 5.00, terus tak lalu makan. I hate eating at shopping malls and expensive restaurants. I want small hawkers food. I want really really pedas food. But the most things that I crave for is food from home. Any home, be it my aunts’, my own, anybody’s home-cooked food. Even if it’s just ikan kerisi masin with ulam and sambal belacan, that would be heaven for me.

I crave for food that I don’t fancy much before like vegetables. I just feel like eating vegetables all the time. Ulam is the top of the list. And I want to eat fruits and drink fresh fruit juices all the time. I totally lost interest in western food and fast food. But I do want Ramlee burger from any stalls tepi jalan.

During my pregnancy with Emmet, I can’t stand fish. But this time, I can’t eat chicken and I crave fish especially ikan kembong and ikan selar. Fried with some salt and ground turmeric, eaten hot from the pan. Sedapnyeee.


At 14 weeks my tummy is already showing with the help of lots of fat of course. But everyone says I am thinner. My husband is in Dublin for a month, so I am a single mother until then. Luckily my mom is here until next week and she helps a lot. And I have my kuih raya to look forward to for the next month. Hopefully the morning sickness will go away by then.

Sape nak order Kuih Raya?

LittleLand Shop skarang dah ada cawangan. Ewah...ewah... Cawangannye bernama LittleLand Bakery.

LittleLand Bakery ni akan start dengan mengambil order utk Kuih Raya. Baking has been my all-time passion ever since I was a little girl. I grew up never having to buy Kuih Raya because my family enjoy making them. We don't make that much, just about 5 different types. And we don't keep much at home since not that many people visit us at home. We are the ones always out visiting people. So most of the cookies we baked would be distributed to my aunts and uncles, my grandmother and also close friends.

I used to love making this kek gulung with strawberry jam filling which I recently discovered it is called bahulu gulung. It is so easy to make and taste so delicious that ever since I started making them, everyone that got one from us would never fail to request for the next Raya. But now my mom's big gas oven was broken beyond repair so we are left with a small electric oven that is impossible to bake the kek gulung. So that is the only tradition that died for our Kuih Raya baking.

(OMG I just felt the baby kicked!)

Another tradition that I would love to see it revived is cooking rendang and dodol in a big kuali underneath my grandmother's house at Kampung Ijok, gotong-royong bakar lemang kat bawah pokok rambutan, menganyam ketupat ramai-ramai. I so missed those days...

I'm Back!

Yes as in back ke tanah air tempat tumpah darah ku.

Dah balik Taiping, dah balik Kota Bharu for a surprised visit because we never told our families we are coming back. So semua pun happy and surprised to see us, especially Emmet.

I'm also about 3 months pregnant. Haven't had time or energy to see a gyn for any check-ups. Feeling sick all the time but no vomitting at all. My head feels so heavy I think I need to lie down all the time. Always don't know what to eat. But right now am so craving for cucur badak and kerabu jantung pisang. As with my last pregnancy, I temporarily lost my talent in cooking.

Also lost interest in cleaning. I am now becoming like my husband, (oops!). I like throwing clothes around the room and the house. I couldn't be bothered with messy kitchen or messy table. I hate pretty clothes, all I really want to wear now are a pair of jogging pants and a baggy old t-shirt.

There are a lot of friends and family that I haven't met. So I hope they would understand that it is almost impossible for me to go and visit each and every one of them at this critical time. I am also looking for a job, preferably the ones that can be done from home. Am looking forward to selling kuih raya soon. Will gather up the energy to make samples before Ramadhan and distribute them during puasa. Really hope I am able to puasa this year.

Waah...really can't look at the laptop for long. It's making me sick!